Hyperhidrosis is probably one of the most embarrassing symptoms I suffer with. It’s a symptom that not only affects me physically but mentally and emotionally; it crushes my self confidence. Hyperhidrosis is a symptom attributed to two of my health conditions; M.E and IST and it can be made worse by my medication. Hyperhidrosis is a symptom that is defined as excessive sweating without physical exertion or excessive temperatures. It doesn’t matter if it’s the middle of winter and snowing outside; I will still be sweating. It doesn’t matter if I’m bundled in clothes or wearing a cami, I’ll still sweat. For me it’s a symptom that has worsened my mental health considerably and flared up my social anxiety.

Minimal exertion makes me sweat horribly, today I changed my bed sheets and by the end of it I looked like I’d just showered. I climb the stairs and I sweat, I clean and I sweat, I stand up too long and I sweat. Even showering causes me to sweat which is the most annoying part because I’ll shower to clean the sweat off my body and I end up getting out the shower and feeling like I shouldn’t have bothered. It’s one thing to manage it at home, in private but a whole other experience to manage it in public. I’m extremely self conscious about it because one of my worst affected areas is my face. I didn’t even know faces could sweat but they can and it’s a miserable experience. Social anxiety makes going out in public hard enough, but constantly worrying about if others have noticed the sweat dripping from my face is all consuming. Every time I walk into a shop I’m instantly wiping my face with my sleeve, I’m constantly checking my face to see how bad the sweating is. I try thinking cool thoughts, thinking of cold things like that will somehow help, if there is air conditioning in a shop then I’m standing under it. I wear waterproof makeup and it still ends up running down my face.

I’ve had a few comments on it in public, not nasty comments but concerned ones. People asking if I’m alright, people commenting that I look really warm or flushed. The thing is, facial sweating in particular is associated with illness in people’s minds so a lot of people have thought I’m unwell. With the Covid pandemic this has been a nightmare because one of the main symptoms is a temperature and people see sweat on my forehead and inch away like I’m contagious. M.E/CFS has made my temperature regulation malfunction so I do constantly run hot and have fever like symptoms, this exacerbates the sweating. With so many places taking temperatures as you enter, it’s been hard and embarrassing. My family have all commented that it doesn’t look that noticeable, that I just looked flushed but no amount of reassurance helps because I’m constantly aware it’s happening. The truth of it is, a lot of the time I don’t think it’s noticeable unless pointed out; but the anxiety over it makes the sweating worse and then other people start to pick up on it.

I’m just tired of constantly having to plan public outings, days before I’m looking through the wardrobe for clothes that I can’t sweat through, clothes that are more airy and loose, I’m planning whether I need to take tissues to dab at myself, I’m planning what makeup has the best chance of staying on my face. For once I’d just like to get up, get dressed into whatever I can find first and go out without worrying how much I’m going to sweat that day. With winter approaching it’s nerve wracking because if people see me sweat in the summer then I can use the excuse the weather as an excuse; but in winter it just seems more out of place and it’s when I think I start to look out of place. I’ve got coffee planned with a friend next week and there’s a huge part of me that just wants to cancel because it’s easier, because I don’t want to have to worry about embarrassing myself or the person I’m with.

It’s a symptom that isn’t painful physically but has real mental implications. The facial sweating doesn’t smell or cause me any physical issues but it’s mentally damaging. It wears away at your self esteem constantly and it makes you paranoid. I’m constantly thinking that when someone is looking at me it’s because I’m sweating, I’m looking out for people noticing it and it’s tiring and frustrating. It takes the enjoyment out of socialising and being out in public places, it makes me feel ugly even if I’m wearing clothes I love and I’ve spent hours on making my makeup perfect. I can’t put into words how emotionally and mentally damaging this symptom is, it ruins my body confidence and the impact on my body image is extensive and very hard to cope with at times. It’s a physical symptom that impacts the whole person and not just one part and there definitely needs to be more understanding and support out there for people who deal with hyperhidrosis.